I think we made google street view...

You tell me...

Is that our van?

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Roxann...

I am so sorry.  I should have taken the pen out of my shirt pocket.  

Please forgive me.

-Spencer

Lindsey...

I am so sorry.

It wasn't my idea.

-Spencer

I didn't do it!

Our playroom/office is a converted garage.  I come up the 3 stairs into the main house and this is the sight that I stumble upon...

What? They fell.

I didn't do it.

This is the sort of thing I deal with on a daily basis.  

A new Slate!

Woo-Hoo, Thanks to Enrichment night I have discovered how to change my backgrounds and add some accessories!  So Enjoy!  I am sure I will be adding and changing things often!  

Sippy-cup Surprise

The rush was exhilirating.  I just couldn't wait to see just what was in store for me.  The present was hidden, far away in the play-room; untouched by human hands and unscanned by the eye for at least 3 days.  It was discovered during a cleaning expedition to the south play-room.  One of the children found it in the futon excurion party.  The layers of ancient kid-mess were carefully removed from the outer shell and it was gently carried to the kitchen for examination.  

That's where I found it.  You see, it had been filed away under a day's worth of dishes, lost to time once again.  It was mine to re-discover.  And so I began my examination of this artifact, excited by the mystery of its contents.

Hot water surged into the sink and the faint waft of steam rose like the morning mist.  My excitement was un-containable as I carefully twisted the top loose.  The smell blasted from the cup, creating an almost visual mushroom cloud of filth.  Powerless to resist, my head instinctively jerked to the left.  The groan was automatic as the tangy, musty stank tore through my olifactory system.  I lurched and dumped the contents down the drain.  As it disappeared into the hot mist of the whirling drain, I saw it.  The prize was there.  Old chocolate milk.  Looks like Saturday.

Thanks, Kids.

Long way to a point

Roxann went off to "All About Girls" (or was it "Time Out for Chicks" or something like that?) this weekend.  Whatever.  It was a convention for Mormon women to get together and complain about how bad they have it and reassure themselves that murdering their no good husbands and unruly children just isn't the answer.  It was a place for them to get together and cry about music and share testimonies and spend money.  It was great for her and she came home really happy.  So I hope she does it again next year.

Anyway...

I was picked up from work on Friday night and basically dropped off at the drive-way (Really, I dropped her off, but I am using a literary paint brush.  Give me a break, here).  Anyway, not wanting to actually feed the children with my own hands, we went over to Little Caesers and picked up a $5 pizza... which ended up being 2 of those, some wings, and a drink.  So that actually came out to about $20 (Sorry, Rox).  The kids and I had a great night.  We ate, watched a movie together and then off to bed.  Roxann came home sometime around 11 or so.  She told me all about it and even brougt me a book to read.  (This book)  Before I went to bed I read quite a bit of it.  We got to bed late and Roxann was planning to get up early the next morning.  That left me to deal with Caitlyn.  'Bout 1Am she peed the bed and got up.  I got her changed out and her bed re-made and back into it.  She got up a couple more times, but eventually I think we got to bed around 1:30.  

I don't even remember what happened next.  I woke up at around 9:30 AM.  Too late.  The kids had trashed the kitchen and were working on the play-room.  We watched a movie for a while and I tried in vain to ge them to clean up the play-room.  Eventually I got them dressed and we played for a while.  The pile of clothes on the couch was calling to me.  "Fold us...  Fold us!  FOLD US!!!"  I ignored it and tried to find a list that I was sure that Roxy had left me.  I found it on the fridge.  It said...  Clean up the porch.  So we did.  In the cold, wet rain (Thanks for that, BTW).  Ben and I got the dishes done (first round).  The laundry was calling again.  I wished it would shut-up.  We had lunch...  of course Caitlyn wouldn't eat it.  She never eats anything.  I put her out for a nap and Ben and I did the second round of dished.  I laid down and only got about a half-hour before Roxann called me and said she was on her way home.  She wanted to go to Adult session of conference.  We had no babysitter.  We had a few offers, but agreed that I would continue to stay with the kids while she went with Jenny and the Bishop.  So finally, we had dinner and I did those stupid clothes on the couch.  All done.  Kids to bed late and I got to relax.

Now let me just take a moment and tell you about the clothes that were folded.  I am going to toot my own horn here because that was a feat.  Seriously.  The clothes pile is an evil monster, bourne of "not enough time" and pickled in "it sucks to do".  When it has fermented long enough and grown large enough it is too horrible a task to undertake.  Each day it feeds on the fresh laundry and our sorrow.  So yesterday, I put on my climbing gear and started the trek to the top so I could dismantle the beast.  It is done and I think that I have post traumatic stress syndrome from it.

Here is the before picture...

And here is the after picture...

I shudder at the thought of doing it again.

Anyhoo...  This is all leading up to something that made me so proud to be a father.  I decided that I would read some stories from the book Roxann brought home for me.  It is a collection of Thomas S. Monson stories.  I read a couple to the kids just before prayer.  They loved them.  Especially Ben.  Ben usually reads for a half-hour or so after we put him to bed.  Saturday night, he asked if he could take it with him.  He read for about an hour before he went to bed.  Tonight, we had a mini-home evening and we read some scripture and another story from the book.  Ben had already read it and was able to contribute to the lesson.  As soon as we were done, he went to the basket and produced a hymnal.  He was looking for a song that was in context with the lesson.  We sang three songs together.  It was awesome.  Tonight, he was out of books to read, so he did what he always does when he is out of books, grabbed his scriptures.  Benjamin is such a good boy.  He has an unparalleled love for reading and especially loves to read his scriptures and anything else of a spiritual nature that sparks his interest.  He is building his testimony in a way that I have never seen before. I am so proud of him.

I have moved.

In the interest of keeping this blog politically neutral, I have moved.  Please feel free to visit Spencer's Super Happy Fun time Right-Wing Word Pit at http://spencerswordpit.blogspot.com

All of my political drivel is over there, including past posts.

Danny, Korynn, Merilee, Bo...

Add me to your sidebars.

Thanks, Guys.

Round and round

OK. I officially think that Caitlyn is trying a new attention getting method.  Only problem is, she get's matthew's help and actually injurs herself.  

Let me start at the beginning.

Yesterday, Roxann had a Doctor's appointment.  It lasted half of the day and she also had a second appt in the afternoon.  I took time off work for this.  Roxy then called me today, just after I had arranged to get off a few minutes early to go and see a dentist.  She told me that she had yet another appt at 3:15.  No problem.  I asked for that time off also.  Then a few minutes later I get THE phone call.

If you have never recieved THE phone call, you are really missing out.  There is usually screaming or crying of some sort going on in the background and someone is either hurt or Roxann is at the end of her rope.  When you answer THE phone call, you usually have to listen carefully through the screaming in the background to cypher what you are being told by your spouse. And the call is never happy, cheerful or full of good news.  It's usually something catastrophic and will usually end in tears.

Well I got THE phone call.

"CAITLYN CUT HER HEAD OPEN AND SHE IS BLEEDING ALL OVER THE PLACE!!!  Come home."

Didn't we just do this?!?!  I think we did.  (here)

She is like that Stone Sour song "scars".  You know... (sing it with me if you know the tune)

♫"Yeah, Cause I am made of scaaaaaaaaaars♫
♫Yes, I am made of scar-ar-arars"♫

But I think that she is doing it to get attention... maybe.  For those of you keeping count, however, that's Caitlyn with 3 sets of stitches in the last year.

The score today was...

Futon - 1, Caitlyn - 0

Double Thanks!

I wanted to add my sincerest appreciation to all of the men and women in the armed forces!  I come from a long line of military so I have an especially soft spot in my heart for anyone willing to sacrifice so much.  I get close to tears just thinking about it!  We are so blessed to have people willing to give their lives so that we can have the freedom to do so much.  A lot is taken for granted, because we just don't know how good we have it!  Thank you, thank you, thank you!!  I think you are all amazing!  

Thanks.

Thanks, Guys.  For all you do for us.

Attention Hog

Caitlyn. yeah, that's right... Caitlyn is an attention Hog. You have to understand the story to understand why Caity is acting like she does. For most of her life, Caityln has been competing with the boys for Dad and Mom's attention. Easy enough. She is a girl and they are boys. That means that attention is spread differently or in other words, she got the lion's share because the boys largely don't care that much. So when Roxy started babysitting a young, female baby in the ward on a daily basis, things changed drastically.
Here is a list of "Attention Getting Activities" that have been approved for use by the "Caitlyn Attention Association":

1. The Fall - This is where Caitlyn will lie down on the floor and exclaim that she has "fallen". Although this techniques is not effective, it still gets employed at least 3 times a week.

2. The Paraplegic - This techniques employs kneeling or "The Fall" and transitions into the statement "I can't walk" usually as a whine. When forced to walk, Caitlyn employs "The Zombie".

3. The Zombie - When she doesn't want to do something and you make her do it, she goes limp, gets a thousand yard stare and reluctantly does it all the while whining and flailing like a zombie.

4. The "Ron Popeil" - When faced with a challenge that requires more work than normal, Caitly will attempt to get help. To achieve this, she will horridly fail at the task in a comical and completely un-realistic manner. Example - putting on a coat. Tugs and flaps the coat, grunts, throws it down, and then whines "I can't do it!".  She most likely learned this technique from Matthew.

5.  The Masochist - Katerina (I hope I Spelled that right, Bonne) is the tiny baby that Roxann baby-sits.  As most of you know, babies like to grab things and have no real motor control.  Similar to the "Tawana Brawley", this particular technique involves Caitlyn puting one or more of her appendages or hair in the line of fire.  Once done, Katerina will most likely grab, hit or scratch (through no fault of her own).  The result is an excuse to tattle about abuse by the new one.

(because Carrot Top is hurting himself by not going away already)

6.  The "Tawana Brawley" - When nudged or bumped into, Caity will throw herself down or employ "The Fall".  Once completed, the tattling begins about how she was wronged or beaten by the brutish other. ...and it's usually a lie.

7.  The Snuggle - This is my favorite and least favorite all at the same time.  At night, after she wakes up to pee, Caity will crawl into bed with us and snuggle.  It has to stop and it makes sleep difficult at times, but it is the most loving and sincere of all of her techniques.  I love it and am almost powerless to stop it.  But it has to stop.  Oh well.